17 Divas Updates

Don't forget to visit us at our new home 17divas.com

Read our latest posts:

Cookies for Everyone! David Cooks Wins American Idol

David Cook American Idol. America Gets it Right!

American Idol Judges Get it Wrong

Cook still melts MY Heart! He is THEE American Idol!

American Idol Stars

Brooke and David Cook bringing it all again. These two are already seasoned musical artists. They have "it!" & I love them. Absolutely amazing!!

If keeps going like this I predict they will be the final two. They are both amazing and unique in their own way and will be stars regardless.

David Cook looking especially hot tonight! Brooke is just so Brooke, she knows who she is as a person and an artist and her raw talent and genuine emotion is beautiful to see. Love the no shoes.

Chikezie surprised me. Well done.

Michael Johns, still a big fan, but agreed with all the judges, he needs to bring it. His voice is awesome.

Miss Rocker Amanda what's her name rocked that new hair do. Was a great makeover for the most part and she gave a good performance I thought. Is she gay? Not that there's anything wrong with that but she was singing about being jealous some guy would get in the way b/w her and her love. oh, maybe she had stripper dude or Noriaga in her ming and she was afraid her man was actually gay and playing her like a fool being in love with another man. Anyway, I was confused. I think she should have changed the pronoun from 'he' to 'she'. Unless she is gay and worried her gay lover is going to go for a dude, or she is not gay but concerned her man is and is going for a dude. I should really edit this b/c I think this is beginning to ramble on saying the same things over again and it is definitely a bit "wordy"

The other performances were, as Simon would say, forgettable except for little David Archeleto's lack of "wordiness" forgetting the lyrics. He had what only a week to learn this song? oh, I sound mean and bitchy. He's only 17. He's learning.

Sorry for such a boring post, if you are even still awake and reading this my apologies. I'm sure I'll have another colorful poem about my undying love for David Cook again soon. You can count on that!

Diva 3 outtie


Technorati Tags: american idol, idol, david cook, 17 divas, brooke white, michael johns, amanda overmyer,david archuleta

David Cook, You Had Me at "Hello"!!

I think my feelings about American Idol this week can best be expressed through the following poem, written by me, Diva 3:

David Cook you make my stir fry
When you sing I let out a sigh
You've got me flying high
So happy we'd be together
if you'd just come on by (my door, "hello, is it me you're looking for?)

The fire's been lit, my cookies are done,
they are burnt & black but I'm not a maniac
I just wanna roll around with you in the sack
You can be my dog, 'ruff ruff' & I'll be your boo
I'll cook you breakfast, do you like tofu scramble too?

Keep on rockin' dog, represent the pound (you, Michael Johns, and Jason are the only dudes in it). You guys make Idol "worthy" (to use a word from the Simonary. His cousin Dick doesn't know what it means and neither do we, but who the bloody fuck cares).

There was more I had to say but David's performance eclipsed everything else for me for the most part and I'm bored at even the very thought of reviewing the others (more than half of which were not even memorable).

A couple last points, in addition to David Cook's absolutely inspired, creatively brilliant and magnificent performance, I think Jason's version of hallelujah was brilliant as well. David, Jason, and Michael are at the top, and David is at the tippy top (please reference the aformentioned notes and poems. That's pretty much how I feel, not entirely per se, but I don't have all day!.)

Also, can the psych medical triage team for Paula Abdul resolve their union issues, cross the f-ing picket line, and get back to work. She's going down and she's taking us all with her. It pains me so to see her babble in languages none of us understand...literally it does pain me...not just per se, like forreal!!

Obsessed DC Fan Diva 3 outtie ~ nighty night!!
(I need to watch DC's new rock ballad hit performance of Hello a few more times on youtube to help rock me to sleep, b/c in "my dreams I kiss his lips a thousand times"...I need to get enough REM time in, 1000 times you know is a lot!)

This wasn't a review per se, but it was in fact my point of view in case anyone gives a s@#$.

Technorati Tags: american idol, idol, david cook, 17 divas, paula abdul, michael johns, tv blog,jason castro

80s Night, Is Paula Feeling All Right??

Diva 1 reporting in on 80s week, Idol style and to echo a fellow Diva -- is anyone tired of this yet? This week's episodes, by and large, were insanely boring but for Paula's ridiculous ramblings and amazing transformation from tuesday's spanish rose to wednesday's tory burch wearing, hair medallion sporting soccer mom.

The general recap? Three Whitney songs (Chikezie, Asia'h and Syesha), one Celine song (David H. -- yes, all the reporters were too kind in reminding people that its a Meatloaf song since the last one to sing it was, in fact, Celine), too many pairs of highwaisted jeans to count, and at least two contestants who seem to think they can sing with their eyes closed and connect with America's home viewers.

The highlights? Jason Castro, weird elfen/Lord of the Rings hairdo aside; David Cook, who bravely made Lionel Richie current as something other than Nicole's father; and Amanda Overmeyer, the nurse/rocker who finally found a genre other than the 60s that offers her some song choices.

The lowlights? Danny Noriega, who moves like a teenage girl/cheerleader; Luke Menard, who forgot that even George Michael appeared somewhat engaging when singing Wake Me Up; Carly Smithson, who seems to have lost all semblance of personality; and Kristy Lee Cook, who simply leaves this Diva at a loss for words.

Tune in next week for more boring Idol-ers revelations... Yawn.

Diva 1 out

Technorati Tags: american idol, idol, jason castro, 17 divas, Chikezie, Asia'h, Syesha,Amanda Overmeyer

Slicin' and Dicin'- Let's Just Cut Them All!

Ok, maybe not ALL of them. But dang, I'd happily cut at least half of them right now and not even think twice.

I have to give Idol credit, though. They started this year off right. After all the uproar over the meanness of last year's audition phase, the judges were noticeably nicer and more constructive. I, for one, was VERY happy with this change. I don't watch Idol to make fun of delusional people, and I really don't watch it to see what kind of obviously planned over-the-top "me so crazy" act some jerk can come up with to get onto TV! Ok Ok, I am glad they left in a *few* delusional people this season- like the over-acting little spoiled brat Simon so rightly called out. But I thought over-all the auditions were pleasantly focused on the talent!

I have mixed feelings about this year's Hollywood week. While some of them may have liked getting the pass to the last day, I think it may have lulled some of them into a false sense of security and superiority. Josiah was clearly robbed, but I think the new process may have disadvantaged him.

My usual complaint with the first few weeks remains, though. They need to give all the members of the top 24 some kind of airtime and backstory. It happens every year- a few poor stiffs make it in that we've never ever seen before, then get cut almost immediately. Some of the unknowns do make it through, but it still doesn't seem fair. Especially with this year's long list of tragedies and sob stories. How could someone like Amy go up against a dead daddy, a sold horse, getting hit by a semi, or a lost voice?? It was a hopeless cause. Based on this theory, I guessed either Amy, Alexandrea, or one of the blond chicks would be gone.

Which brings us to this week's performances and cuts. I'll admit my earlier complaint doesn't hold exactly true. I do admit that, yes, Amy pretty much sucked and deserved to go home. But I feel bad- all the way to the top 24 and we know NOTHING about her. I know way more than I want to about perfectly average Carly. I was so glad Simon brought her down a notch. I kinda like her, but I'm sick of the hype. And her awful sperm eye-brows.

What was really too bad is we did have back story on Joanne, she seemed likable, had a pretty good performance, and yet, she got sent home. WTF people? Is this going to be one of those wonky years when I feel I have to vote for hours to balance out all the crazy people voting for no-talent brats??

OK, so if I could cull the herd now, who would I cut? Heck it might be easier to say who I'd like to see stay. LOL

But seriously, first on the chopping block would be the unbelievably, mind-bogglingly awful and obnoxious Danny Noriega. I see kids like him and I want to weep for the future, to steal a line from a movie that will age me, Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Maybe I am getting too old for Idol?

I would also love to wave good-bye to David Cook (way too wanna-be cool), Jason Yeager (just too cheesy and awful for words), and Luke (wait, he's even MORE cheesy and awful, although easier on the eyes). For the girls, I'd get rid of one of the blond girls, but I'm seriously not sure who is who.

I'm pulling for Amanda to start making some better song choices, I love her voice. I do want to re-do her rocker-chick look. I would still make her look rocker- just better.

On the other end of the spectrum, I'm oddly intrigued by Brooke White. I usually hate these kind of people. But she's pure without being the slightest bit preachy. A rare combination. In that vein, can I just say how happy I was that awful abstinence preacher girl got cut!! Although I did feel bad she's getting taken for a ride by her "coach," the former Idol contestant. Wow.

I'm waiting for great things from David A, David H, Jason, and of course, Michael Johns. His version of Bohemian Rhapsody was mind-blowing. I want more like that, I agreed with Simon, that was better than this week's Doors cover. If Chikezie can get it together, he could really surprise us.

Another thing I'm struck by is how many of this year's contestants tried out, and failed at various points, in previous years. How far can you get before they say you can't come back?? It is a *little* ridiculous. Not to mention those who have previous record contracts and touring experience.

But despite any disappointments, I can't wait for next week!

Mommy Diva Out! (I can't remember my number- who am I??)


Technorati Tags: american idol, idol, ai, 17 divas, hollywood week, david cook, tv blog,danny noriega

If Ya Wannabe My Idol...

You've got to be upbeat, make sure your song's not pitchy and don't forget to move your feet....

Ok, so at least one Diva is still suffering the effects of Monday's Madison Square Garden outing to the Spice Girls. However, last night's vote-off victims could have taken a cue from mes amies spice as they were evidently completely unaware -- despite Colton Berry's professed "love" of all-things-Idol -- of the unfallible Idol rules that must be followed if you want to make it into the top 12:

(1) don't sing anything by Mariah, Whitney, Celine, Peabo Bryson, Richard Marx or Luther Vandross during the first few weeks;

(2) do not sit on a chair; and

(3) do not sing a slow song.

Garrett, Colton and Amy proved to be totally ignorable -- but for their fashion faux pas and pitchy droning... and thus suffered a hasty exit last night, made all the more hasty by Seacrest's blissful cut-to-the-cut approach. I'm not even sure one could rip off a bandaid faster than Seacrest let the farewells fly last night...

Diva 1 has to exclude Joanna from the foregoing categories, however. Joanna proved that she could dress herself well and, despite the pitch problems and nerves, was far better than this seasons Britney-wannabe, Carrie Underwood look alike, or cowgirl/prom princess who kicked off the womens show on Wednesday (collectively, "the blondes").

Thanking their lucky stars last night were Mr. Moon River, Ch-Cheezy, Orlando Blook look-alike Luke (something), Scatwoman and the Blondes. As for the rest of us, its safe to say we were left to wonder why we couldn't just cut to the top 12, how many more group numbers must be endured and if there's a device to erase Paula's throw-back 80s video from our minds completely.... Oh yeah, and why the kids had to be publicly kicked to the curb in their second-hand group number costumes. In the immortal words of Aaron, "un uh, not cool!"

Until next week, Diva 1 out!

Technorati Tags: american idol, idol, ai, 17 divas, hollywood week, colton berry, tv blog,spice girls

Not Your American Idol

Is it just me or do about half the men look like women? I just can’t get over it....(Leif) Garrett, Noriega, Hernandez, and Colton (who actually made reference to how he looks like Ellen DeGeneres). Not that there's anything wrong with this, but it's just a bit confusing. If I wasn't paying attention, or say maybe dosed off for a few (which given these performances would not be out of the question) I may open my eyes and think it's ladies night...what the F?

And then there are the manly men that are just a deilish dish to feast our eyes on…there’s aussie hottie Michael Johns (I can even forgive him for having 2 first names), and Luke Menard. Michael has “it” I think. The beginning of the Doors song he did made me melt like cheese in a Ray’s Pizza’s oven (shout out to all the New Yorkers in the m-en-f-en haaooooouuuuuuuuuuse!). Hot and sexy, I’m totally down with MJ!

Moving on...Speaking of cheese, how about that Cheezie, oops that’s Chikezie!!!!

Of the women, I think Miss Syesha is awesome, she’s my fave pick for the ladies so far. There we some other interesting performances. I like the nurse-rocker.

Overall, there’s been a shadow over this years Idol since the pick of the top 24 show. And that shadow is mixed with a bit of anger. The honeymoon AI and I have been having over the years is finally over at least for now. We may be able to reignite the spark, but it may take some time. It’s like they cheated on me and I’m mad as hell. It is hard for me to see the top 12 men, especially the 6 or 7 lame ones and not feel this way. Why are these fuckers there and my boy Josiah is out sitting in his car!? That Josiah has it all…an amazing artist! His own songs are fabulous. He could make an album today and it’d go platinum, no doubt. Love, love, LOVE him & LOVE Ellen DeGeneres for all her fabulousness she sees the truth too and had him on her show yesterday. It was amazing. She showered him with gifts (which I don’t think even half will fit in his car, but something tells me he’s not going to be living in that car much longer).

Nuff said ~

Diva 3 out for now ~

Technorati Tags: american idol, idol, josiah, 17 divas, ellen degeneres, ai, michael johns,idol recap

Idol With a Vengeance!

Yes, ladies and gents, the long-awaited, post-Super Bowl schmorgasborg of American Idol has returned -- and with it, more diva-licious observations from your favorite reality tv mavens.

This year brings even more sad stories than usual. Diva 1 counted in just two shows (Hollywood week and Miami) 2 very recent patriarchal deaths, one heroic crash survivor, one more recent and slightly less tragic crash survivor (given that the show prominently featured her riding her motorcycle with reckless abandon), 3 janis joplin impersonaters (2 of whom were also in the crash survivor category), 1 beauty queen, immigration problems, innumerable "this is my last chance"-ers and too many single parents to count (including one refreshingly single dad -- doesn't anyone else besides Diva 1 wonder why the single pops never turn out for reality tv?).

This year's crop of potential American Idols include (to name a few): a nurse, a plus-size model, a former boy bander from miami, a 16-year-old, a rastafarian (at least by looks), a daughtry-wannabe, an Irish girl and an Australian mate. In usual form, we saw too little of half of the members of "our" top 24 to cast odds or truly pick a front runner, although I think many will keep an eye on Carly (the irish girl allergic to her dog) and David Hernandez (a Simon pronouncement that one will have to work harder is always a good sign) -- front runners if any are to be had.

Diva 1 would be uttterly remiss if she didn't note Idol's hugest mistake to date -- sending Josiah home without a ticket to the top 24. The child had more talent in his pinky that last year's boring, beat-boxing, boy-bander Blake and an interesting tonal quality to his voice. Not to mention a story made for sweeps week. Diva 1 is sure she wasn't the only one to discover that THIS was not the decision that Simon utterly disagreed with...

Anyhooo, stay tuned as the Divas gear up for another scandal-filled season of American Idol, with forays into all of your other "faves" of the season -- including Flavor of Love, Rock of Love and any other truly tragic excuse we can find not to do our real work!

Diva 1 out

Technorati Tags: american idol, idol, hollywood week, 17 divas

Bizzaro Night On Idol!!

Very Swollen Diva wasn't sure if the pregnancy hormones had finally boiled her brain away to the point she could no longer properly assess contestants!! Phil rocked the house? LaKeisha kicked serious ass? Chris didn't sing out of his nose the whole time? Blake was far from boring?? And Jordin sucked beyond all belief and recognition??

At least Melinda was there to anchor things with another solid performance. Unlike Diva One, I could tolerate her affect after tonight's performance. I felt as if rockin' out to Bon Jovi was totally out of her comfort level, unlike so many of her other performances- that are usually better but obviously more in her comfort zone. So, she really did need the reassurance that, yes, she once again proved she's the best vocalist and showman in the bunch.

But back to our surprises- once again, I marveled at Phil. He was damn lucky to last this long and finally hit his stride. I did see what Simon was getting at, but not to that extent. Phil isn't a rocker, and shouldn't really aspire to be. And come on Diva One, surely you jest, he just doesn't have that cool-hotness that Chris Daughtry did! Phil is a dork, and a little creepy- but he's really proving himself to be a helluva performer! There's a niche for him- not rock, not crooning, but maybe some Christian/Country type music? Someone obviously likes him- other than just Diva One!

I've been ready to see LaKeisha go, but I would truly be sad if she went home after this week's utterly amazing performance. She got both her brains and her pipes back. She made a wise choice of song and interpretation, with virtually no shouting. Yes, she did truly deserve that kiss, and seeing Simon with her lipgloss all over his face was the highlight of the night!

The lowlight, however, was my usual favorite- Jordin. I'm hoping that her frank admission that she totally sucked will save her, along with her excellent performance (and tons of votes) from last week. She honestly rivaled Sanjaya in her out and out suckiness. If I had been able to fast forward through it, I would have. Good lord.

And I finally realized JUST how young she is- her MOTHER grew up on Bon Jovi?? And poor Jordin clearly did not know this song at all. Which this child of the 80's/90's finds completely incomprehensible. Contestants like Phil were clearly at the advantage this week- he'd been practicing his song in the mirror almost as long as Jordin has been alive!

My real and true highlight of the night was BLAKE!! I loved it. I'd listen to it. I'd buy it. DH said he'd buy an album of Blake's Idol performances thus far. I agree, I thought last night's performance was BRILLIANT. He kept the big rockin' chorus we all love, but twisted all the right spots to make it his own. He made everyone else look like they were singing Karaoke. I hope his gamble pays off.

And Chris, I liked him, liked he knew someone had to sing Dead Or Alive, liked his less-nasally tone, but I think this is his swan song. Two people have to go this week, and I just cannot fathom how he cannot be one of them.

But who will the other one be??? LaKeisha? Jordin? I'm really not sure, but we all know how unpredictable Idol can be, so there's a good chance we could see *gasp* Melinda go home. And Blake's big gamble could kill him. I loved it, but I think Simon and Bon Jovi are right- there are a lot of people like Diva One who don't want some weird kid messing around with their Bon Jovi!

Diva Four speaks the greatest truth about out night, though. What the hell was up with Monkey Boy George Bush showing up?? I was really touched by last week's fundraiser, but seeing the Bushes last night made me shudder. Blech.

I must agree with Diva One- Bon Jovi proved himself to be a great mentor. LuLu might still be my favorite of this season, but I really enjoyed his frankness and enthusiasm. I must admit, I was kind of dreading a night of Bon Jovi, fearing it would be a night of retro shouting. But this ended up being one of my favorite Idol nights!

Of course, it could be the hormones talking. Oh, and as of today, they estimate Baby Joe weighs 8 lbs 14 ounces. And the due date is still 9 days away!! Wish me luck ladies. I know my doctor is hoping I'll go into labor next Wednesday because she's on call- but that means missing Idol!!!

Technorati Tags: american idol, melinda, american-idol, george bush, simon cowell, bon jovi, 17 Divas, phil stacey, jordin sparks,blake,melinda doolittle

A Kiss and A Bush as Idol Rocks Bon Jovi Night

Simon must be getting some, b/c he's spreading the love. Simon kissed Lakisha after her performance he thought she was so good. Ryan, in particular, enjoyed that.


I'll say I thought everyone rocked it tonite! i Loved Blake's beeebop version! that was hot dawg! Chris is just adorable! and Melinda's attitude was da bomb!

Jordin's hair did looked a like a dead animal. and have to say, she was my least favorite of the nite.

oh, wait, no she wasnt'. my least favorite of the night was George and Laura Bush's cameo political maneuver to "get jiggy" with the young folks while commending the Idol viewing public for their generous contributions to Idol Gives Back. I'm sorry, but I didnt' hear them make a donation. Just a bad joke or two. At least he didn't stutter. Very bizarre.

d4


Technorati Tags: american idol, Idol Gives Back, american-idol, lakisha, simon cowell, bon jovi, 17 Divas

All That Glitters ...

Is Paula, apparently. If she's not auditioning for a role in the LA reprisal of Dreamgirls, which apparently she's not because those girls were on Dancing With the Stars tonight, then she had no business wearing all that glittery gold nonsense. And I'm sorry, but Fantasia is not -- despite Paula's pronouncement -- in the same league as Celine, Mariah and Whitney. She's starring in The Color Purple for crying out loud.

A few other nonsensical observations before Diva 1 gets down to biznass...

First, Simon was looking, in the immortal words of Austin Powers, "dead sexy" tonight, even if Diva 1 is certain that he was wearing parachute pants with that top. The Other Simon -- Le Bon that is -- called, and he wants you to stop raiding his Duran Duran museum. Second, last week's ridiculous claim of "the highest vote ever in a top 7 show" conclusively proves that, despite all claims, even die hard Idol fans have gotten a little idle with the dialing (or just plain bored with this year's contestants). Hence tonight's "extra" voting time. Diva 1 predicts it won't help. But tune in tomorrow anyway for "the highest vote ever in a top 6 contest with 3 women and 3 men singing inspirational tunes..." and Sanjaya, on Leno, wearing Paula's outfit.

And now, for the contestants:

Diva 1 agreed with the judges that Chris R. started the night off with a killer vocal and performance, even if it took him about 20 seconds to really get started. However, he looked like he was headed to the local sadie hawkins dance with the cargos and the suit coat. Killer jacket? Only if we're talking about his fashion sense.

Diva 1 agrees with Swollen Diva -- Melinda is phoning it in, and her outfit was no exception to the conclusion that this was just another day at the office for her. Beware, however. Hayley wore those same shoes, and she's gone. This may mean Melinda finds herself in the bottom for the first time tomorrow.

Diva 1 agrees again with Swollen Diva, and the judges, that Blake was rather boring tonight. Surprisingly, it's Diva 1's favorite vocal of his in the last few weeks even if it wasn't very original or exciting. Apparently singing John Lennon requires an "homage" jacket. And while the Divas are sure that Paula gets all "sensitive and emotional" about Blake, let's keep the comments to the song please!

Lakisha, Lakisha, Lakisha. As Swollen Diva notes, Diva 1 rightly warned about the folly of picking an Idol song. Two Idol songs + two weeks = bottom two.

Phil. Another great song choice, and great performance (albeit slightly less great than last week). I just wish he would quit dressing like a poor man's Frank Sinatra. The hat worked for bald Daniel Powter, a 35-ish no man who bolted to the peak of fame last year with his "Bad Day" song, and it can work for you Phil! Besides, even if your wife needs to wear an H&M dress (and she was), you have an army of stylists at your disposal. Use them, Diva 1 would!

Diva 1 hopes, however, that Simon's prediction comes true and Phil is around for a little while longer...

Finally, Jordin. Diva 1 was waiting for Randy's signature pronouncement: "it was a little pitchy in the beginning, and the end, but the middle was hot!" Is Diva 1 the ONLY one who sees this? We want to love her as much as SD, but I feel like she's not giving me much to work with... other than that dress! Where can I get one?!

Until tomorrow, Diva 1 out!

Technorati Tags: american idol, american-idol, Paula Abdul, Phil Stacy, Chris Richardson, 17 Divas, Fantasia, Simon Cowell

Ah, what a great night of Idol. Honestly, I would not have cared if they all sang Whitney covers tonight. At least Sanjaya was gone. I loved that no one mentioned him, but I felt sure that's at least part of what Simon was referring to when he said that the competition really started tonight.

Are we ready to make finalist predictions?? Once again, I think Jordin has a strong chance to win it all. Everyone loves to see a contestant grow, and while Melinda is awesome, she's been unchangingly awesome from the first week. Jordin, on the other hand, has made a couple of stumbles, but in the last two weeks has pulled off those "rising music" performances that win Idol competitions.

Don't get me wrong, I loved Melinda's performance. She's mind-boggingly good. She is truly in a class by herself. But, honestly, she's too good for Idol. And that's why I don't think she'll win.

For once, I see what Diva One means about Blake being boring. I think he gave a solid performance, and I love the tone of his voice, but he hasn't been pulling out the "wow" factor needed at this stage in the competition.

And LaKeisha. *sigh* She needs to go for her sheer stupidity in picking yet another song from a former Idol. Good Lord, do these people not read Diva One's Lessons??? Hell, even PAULA told her it was a bad choice. Well, told her as much as Paula can.

The rest...who were they?

Swollen Diva OUT


Technorati Tags: american idol, american-idol, Paula Abdul, Lakisha, Melinda, 17 Divas, Jordin Sparks

Sanity Returns to the Reality TV Universe!!

I will probably just echo the feelings of my fellow Divas, and probably all of the hearing world, but PRAISE JESUS, the reign of terror/joke that is Sanjaya is FINALLY OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And not only that, drug-addled Jael finally got the boot from American's Next Top Model.

For the first time in many Wednesdays, I slept soundly, knowing that a few things were right in the world.

Diva 1, right there with you on your assessment of Country Night, except of course for your Blake bash. It was even MORE exciting given how the voting shook out. What a bottom three that was!! Blake and LaKeisha! Wowza.

LaKeisha did deserve her spot in the bottom. She has done nothing in weeks and weeks but prove that, as DH said from the beginning, she is a one-trick-pony. Her voice certainly has power, but no real range or versatility. And that power was all yelling on Tuesday- yelling at poor Baby Jesus that HE HAD BETTER COME AND TAKE THIS DAMN WHEEL, DAMMIT!! As Diva 1 so rightly pointed out, she broke the rules picking a former Idol's song, and although she won with that choice once, she got stung this time. I think her time on Idol is drawing to a close, she is just no match for Jordin or Melinda.

As much as I love Blake, he did kinda suck this week. But Diva 1 still shouldn't bash him! :) Was it me or was he horribly pitchy?? I was waiting for the judges to go in for the kill, but then they praised him? Even this Blake fan thought that was bizarre.

I also didn't think Jordin's vocals were all that. And I found her song choice oddly impudent. But once again Simon and I were sharing a brain. As her voice soared and she closed the song, I thought to myself "she could actually win this."

And just a few words about Phil- I still can't stand him, but I gotta him credit. He was AMAZING. Where has this guy been all season?? My jaw was on the floor. I kept checking myself- what, wait, this is Phil? This is country? But this is actually good??

I feel as if Idol is finally back on track- Diva 4 was correct, justice was finally served to Sanjaya, and we actually saw some interesting performances and growth among the contestants! This is shaping up to be an interesting battle!

Swollen Diva Out!
22 days until Due Date!!!


Technorati Tags: american idol, american-idol, Sanjaya Malakar, idol, reality television

Justice is SERVED!! on American IDOL!!

FINALLY! Justice is served on a platter this week, with Sanjaya Malakar being eliminated from American Idol.

How La Lu YA Praise the Lord!!

Bye, Bye, Sanjaya, don't let the Idol door hit your boney ass on the way out!!

Nice try, Vote for the Worst and Howard Stern - hope you enjoyed yourselves.

I have nothing more to say.

D4 outie.

Technorati Tags: american idol, american-idol, Sanjaya Malakar, idol, reality television

Jesus Take the Microphone

Idol agreed was on the better side this week, but then this diva has a hankering for country. I LOVED jordin and Melinda... for me my top 2.

Sanjaya is getting more ridiculous every week and the bigger joke is that he seems so taken with himself. The only thing more tragic than Sanjaya tonite for me was Avril Lavigne's racoon eye make-up on Letterman. Someone please remove all makeup from her possession until the girl learns how to use it without offending defenseless wildlife.

Seacrest and Cowell got into some naughty bickering with Ryan practically coming to Sangina's defense. Is it me, or is this turning into a three-way?

and speaking of Letterman, for those who missed it, the 20-something geek who started the 'votefortheworst' website was a Tonight Show guest and is collecting his 15 minutes of fame. Apparently being the worst and voting for the worst clearly have their priveleges.

In other reality Tv news, Bachelor Officer Andy finally sent home Barbie Doll #2. Erin I think her name was. Her and her fast friend who went packing last week clearly took a wrong turn on their way to starring on "The Girls Next Door".

On Workout, Jackie is working out her lips juggling Rebecca and Tiffany.

And my favorite family, The Roloffs, celebrated Amy's Birthday and Molly's 13th birthday with some good old fashion cake.

D4 out.

Technorati Tags: american idol, american-idol, Sanjaya Malakar, The Bachelor, letterman, Jordin Sparks, idol, reality television, workout, avril lavigne

Gina's Graceful Farewell on Idol

well, another elimination nite on idol and another talented idol contestant gets robbed by Sanjaya. Not even in the bottom 3, Sanjaya should feel like a schmuck for being in this competition while actual talent leaves us each week and he stays to annoy us some more with his ridiculous hair, oversized clothing and cocky attitude that makes Simon seem nice. He should take his skinny ass and vote himself off and run far far away. Sanjaya has made this season of American Idol an absolute Farce!

Gina and Haley were voted in the bottom 2 tonite. Haley clearly thought it was her swan song but her "great leg" campaign seems to be working for her. She's working her gams for everything they've got and as Simon admitted, she's got some great legs. She's appeared in nothing but short shorts and short dresses up to her cooter since the competition began. When she inevitably IS voted off Idol, this diva's fairly sure she can book a Nair commercial.

Gina was graceful and fought thru her tears to sing her final song on idol tonite, ironically titled "smile though your heart is aching". Sorry, Gina. Check your bank account tomorrow - Sangina strikes again!

I can just imagine the contempt the other Idol contestants must have towards Sangina on these elimination nites.

But, Idol world, fear not. Idol fame is what you make of it whether you're # 5 or #1. Anyone heard a peep from Taylor Hicks since last season? uh no. But Kelli Pickler and Chris Daughtry are everywhere... you almost forget who actually won the competition.

D4 annoyed and out.

Technorati Tags: american idol, american-idol, Sanjaya Malakar, Gina Glocksen, idol elimination night, Haley Scarnato, idol, fox, reality tv

Gwen Stefani goes on an Idol Smack Down!!

Ok, it doesn't sound like dear old Gwen did much more than listen to our Idols sing through their songs once. But did I love that she was honest about not liking what some of them did, and her critiques were spot on. I can't believe some of our Idols didn't listen to her advice- or did they ever hear it?? AND it sounded like she's actually been watching the show! But I do still love having the sweet has-beens like LuLu on the show. They just get so excited. Idol is just too cheesy to justify real stars like Gwen and J.Lo.

Anyway- tonight's performances. As usual, Melinda blew everyone out of the water. I do love seeing her every week. Has the girl ever hit a wrong note in her entire freaking life??? I can't believe she worked as a back up singer and no one saw the talent radiating off of that girl. I'm betting there are some producers kicking themselves now.

But I have to say, what I enjoyed most this week was seeing the hard work some of our Idols are putting into winning this thing. This effort was by far the most evident in Gina. I was blase about her early in the season, but she's seriously growing on me. She is clearly going above and beyond the advice the judges are giving her. She's toning up her body, working on her voice, and being savvy about her song choice. As brilliant as Melinda is, there is something fun about watching someone like Gina pour it on.

Same could be said, to some extent, for both Jordin and Phil. I adore Jordin, and still overall like her more than Gina, but her performance this week wasn't as great as last week. And I still can't stand Phil, but I gotta admit, he has improved and grown. His vocals tonight were great. But he still creeps me out. Bad. *Shudder*

But I'm with the judges- by far my frontrunner for the guys is Blake. I didn't love love love tonight, but I do love love love him. I'd buy an album of just what he's done so far on Idol. For reals.

Last week, Diva Husband challenged Swollen Diva to name her top four. I had a hard time with the decision last week. but this week, I'm pretty confident. At least with who I *think* should make it. Sooo....drum roll please...my top four: Melinda, Blake, Jordin, and Gina. That's who I'd like to see, but I have a fear Chris R. will knock out Gina.

Who else sang? Does it matter? Oh, yeah, Sanjaya. Simon is right, as usual. He's in his own universe. He's staying another week. I have accepted it. There's just no point in giving spoilers like Howard Stern and the trolls at Vote for the Worst the satisfaction of ranting about their tactics. I may be lame for loving Idol, but I think it has got to be even more lame to be a "Vote for the Worst" supporter. LOL

My guess for who's going home, putting aside Sanjaya: I think it *should* be Hayley. I thought her performance was literally painful. But I think that both Chris's are in trouble.

Ok, Swollen Diva has to go pack now. Heading to Baltimore for a conference in the AM. We're driving...and stopping every 30 minutes to pee! Wish us luck!!!


Technorati Tags: american idol, american-idol, Sanjaya Malakar, Gwen Stefani, Vote for the worst, Melinda Doolittle, Gina Glocksen, Blake

Phil Stacey is the Bomb Diggity!

Diva 1, after a short hiatus, is back tonight with thoughts abrim on Gwen Stefani night. Prepped with a panoply of notes, she is prepared to declare Phil Stacey tonight's stand out winner -- if only for the fact that he followed the cardinal Idol rule -- Never Sing the Guest Artist's Song. Ever. Phil's outfit was rocking and finally made him look more like a pop-star than a pin-up grandfather. He delivered a superb vocal, without any crazy eye syndrome, and picked a song that made you forget his ineptness at stomping around the stage and his macarena-like hip shaking of last week. Loved it, and loved him. To quote his wife's sign from last week, Divas Loved Our Sailor!

(Diva Note: Phil's excellence was not suppressed by the fact that my dvr chose Phil's soaring chorus to freeze up for an entire second -- the beauty of the time display -- and demonstrate fully the fallacy of taping both Dancing with the Stars and Idol at the same time. For future reference, all fellow DWS addicts should simply turn over at 5 to 10 to see who gets ousted unceremoniously.)

(Side side note: Diva 1 is seriously bummed that she won't see Paulina P -- aka Ms. Ric Ocasek -- work her magic on DWS. Diva 1 demands a recount, or at least that Ms. Mills' partner rip off the fake leg like Billy Ray scalped Karina.)

Tonight's runner-up prize goes to Gina Glocksen -- although I had to close my eyes to try to wipe the heinous outfit out of my short (and long) term memory, the vocal was the best female vocal of the night. My only advice? Fire that stylist, and the hair dresser who turned you into a one-eyed wonder. You are not the invisible daughter from The Incredibles.

As for the rest...

Lakisha: Great as always, but I wasn't really loving the outfit OR the arrangement of the song. I should know, as I dance around to that song frequently in my apartment courtesty of the Charlies' Angels Deux soundtrack.

Fro Patrol: This was the first time I really enjoyed him singing, b/c the song showed off the tone and range of his voice. But I desperately want to dress him in a DARK shirt and LIGHT jacket, and not the other way around as he apparently insists on each week. I also want to tell him (in my mother's best kitchen voice) to PUT THE MIKE STAND DOWN.

Singing Machine: First to break the afore-mentioned cardinal rule for the SECOND time, and the best thing I can say about the hairdo is it made him look 15 years older. Plus he forgot the words. But I bet he'll be back next week. He is this year's equivalent of the "She-Bangs" boy, but for the fact he made it past initial auditions.

Hayley: Did anyone else think she looked like Paula's twin sister tonight? Hair -- horrific. And just b/c it was an 80s song didn't mean she had to resurrect something her much older sister bought at Express in 1982. The Old Lady is back, and she's BORING.

Melinda: Excuse Diva 1 for being a bit snobby, but given the army of stylists, I don't think anyone should be wearing a top that is currently on exhibit in every Bebe store window on 3rd Avenue and in Las Vegas (seriously, the Divas were just there -- and its on every Bebe mannequin west of the Missouri river). Only real critique of another good performance? Lose the belt next time.

Blake: Does anyone BUT Diva 1 think he's really not as much as the judges think he is? The outfit was like a straight jacket (the pants were even peg-legged, an offense one Diva will recognize as wolf-acious) and he was boring as all get out. Plus I'm EXTREMELY TIRED of staring up his nostrils every week. Naturally, Paula loved it.

Jordin: Diva is reminded of that famous saying -- one giant step for Jordinkind (last week), two massive steps backward this week. It was like a school girl talent routine fresh out of Mean Girls -- outfit included. Also, I thought it was extremely pitchy. And most idol-escents get chastised for allowing the back-up singers to do the heavy lifting.

Chris: For Diva 1, this was the third best performance of the evening. Not nasally and, although it was a little tentative at the start, the second half was great. I think he has a better voice than Blake by 10 miles, and with his tone I want to hear him sing some Stevie Wonder. I do want to warn him though, Members Only called and they're looking for their jacket.

Final thoughts? Paula looked weirdly old tonight, I must throw out my silver eye shadow (if I had some) immediately. I hate Gwen Stefani for looking so great even without her over-the-top fabulous diva make-up of yore. And her white patent platforms were the bomb, dawg!

Diva 1


Technorati Tags: american idol, american-idol, Sanjaya Malakar, Gwen Stefani, phil stacey, Paula Abduhl, haley scarnato, chris sligh

Mystery of Crying Girl on American Idol Solved

For anyone who saw Tuesday nights American Idol and the mystery girl in the audience crying her eyes out the duration of the show and wondered, "who is she?" or "is there something wrong with her?" we have the answer.

The crying girl on idol - as she'll now be known for all time - is named Ashley, age 13 from Riverside California. She and her mother appeared with Meredith Vierra this morning to talk about her flood gates of tears.

Apparently she is the "Uber Idol Fan". Half of her bedroom is decorated with Spongebob and the other half with American Idol.

Ashley professes to vote but not JUST for Sanjaya. She also votes for Melinda, Gina and Jordin. Ashley's dream is to go the the American Idol finale. Geez, this Divas thinking she's pretty much got that one in the bag.

Meanwhile, Keith Olbermann and Maria Milito speculate on msnbc that this girl was a "plant". She apparently had tickets to "Smarter than a 5th grader" and somehow ended up crying at the idol rehearsals where she began sobbing immediately and gee, out of nowhere, ends up in the front row of American Idol taping next to Simon Cowell. Real or Memorex? you decide.

However she got there, we at 17 Divas would just like to thank Ashley personally for making the rest of our Idol lives a living hell. It's tweens like her that have kept this loser on and tweens like her who will in all likelihood make Sanjaya the next American Idol.

-D4


Technorati Tags: american idol, american-idol, crying idol girl

Melinda, Jordin and Blake My Idol Top 3

First, a shout out to Paula Abduhl, who might be having the most tastefully dressed Idol season to date.

And, let the twists and turns continue with Paula's comment to the nervous idol hopefuls to just picture Simon naked - to which Simon retorted - 'ah is that what you do all day?" keeping it real for the folks. thanks guys. Sadly, as i may have eluded to in prior seasons that Simon can sometimes be alluring.... but i digress.

Two hours of Idol and here's how it rounded out for me tonite:

Haley - she's kicking up the sex factor in short shorts and a silk halter tank minus the pasties. she had far less armpit shots than usual which I am thankful for.

Blake - owned it and rocked it.

Sanjaya - brought me back to being at a drunkin college fraternity party and he was the guy who had one too many trying to show off. His oversized clothing and extra-broad jackets swim more on him the worse he dances. Go Home, PLEASE. Go home!

Jordin - was awesome. gave me goosebumps. how come sometimes i look at her and i see America Ferrara but prettier.

Lakisha - agreed with the judges - bring back Lakisha. but i still love her.

Phil - bores me.

Chris Sligh - ditto.

Melinda - awesome! paula had it dead-on - she tells a story with her singing and there's a beginning, a middle and an end.

if i didnt mention you, i forgot about you.

My top props for the nite go to Melinda and Jordin!

oh, and who was that Ashley girl crying for the entire show? at first, i, like simon, thought she was crying because Sanjaya and his hair were scaring the crap out of her.

Til Tomorrow, Diva 4 out the door,
:)


Technorati Tags: american idol, american-idol, Simon Cowell, paula abduhl,Melinda Doolittle,Jordin Sparks,fox, Blake, Sanjaya Malakar