17 Divas : Dish about Celebrity, Reality TV, Entertainment & More!

Read our rants on reality tv, celebreality, celebrity, entertainment, movies, television, pop culture, fashion and other snarky tid-bits.

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Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Support Idol Gives Back!

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Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Idol Gives Back and a Diva Celeb Sighting

The Idol Gives Back show aired tonite with the focus on charity more than singing. Kudos for AI for using their super powers for good! To find out how you can help, visit Idol Gives Back.

I was grateful to not have to watch a another romper-roomish Ford commercial featuring the contestants. I TOTALLY agree with Diva 1 - Simon looked HOT! Seeing him be nice to poor children kind of made him half human.

My ears must need to be cleaned because I had the opposite reaction to every contestant than the judges. I LIKED Blake - they hated him. I thought Chris hit some blatantly off-key notes - they loved him. Ditto for Jordin, she sounded shaky and off to me and they loved her.

I DID like Phil this week - 1st time. Lakisha and Melinda didnt wow me. And again, I agree with D1, Paula was a little wack-a-doodle comparing Fantasia to Celine and Maria. (please do not interpret this as I like Celine - I don't!!)

Now that Sanjaya is gone I don't really care who goes home.. I think it's anyone's game at this point.

Meanwhile, Diva 3, who has been delinquent in posting, had dinner at the table next to my absolute FAVE singer of the moment, Corinne Bailey Rae and her entourage, at a fave UWS eatery known for yummy lychee mist martinis! Good think I wasnt there, I might have asked her to put her records on and sing...especially after a martini or ten.

on another reality note, Bachelor Andy Baldwin did a pretty good job of sending home the "crazies" on last nite's Bachelor. Bye-bye to Stephanie Kansas and her fake hooters, brunette who made funny faces and tall blonde chic whose name escapes me. Amber staying was a surprise to me. I don't like her. But clearly Andy does. Bevin's whining about her foot is tiresome. So far my bets are on Tessa, time will tell. Andy seems nice and all but he's got pointier and harder tits than Simon or me.

don't even get me started on 'Dancing with the Stars.' You know how I know that show's gay? a 40 yr old virgin told me!

D4 outie

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All That Glitters ...

Is Paula, apparently. If she's not auditioning for a role in the LA reprisal of Dreamgirls, which apparently she's not because those girls were on Dancing With the Stars tonight, then she had no business wearing all that glittery gold nonsense. And I'm sorry, but Fantasia is not -- despite Paula's pronouncement -- in the same league as Celine, Mariah and Whitney. She's starring in The Color Purple for crying out loud.

A few other nonsensical observations before Diva 1 gets down to biznass...

First, Simon was looking, in the immortal words of Austin Powers, "dead sexy" tonight, even if Diva 1 is certain that he was wearing parachute pants with that top. The Other Simon -- Le Bon that is -- called, and he wants you to stop raiding his Duran Duran museum. Second, last week's ridiculous claim of "the highest vote ever in a top 7 show" conclusively proves that, despite all claims, even die hard Idol fans have gotten a little idle with the dialing (or just plain bored with this year's contestants). Hence tonight's "extra" voting time. Diva 1 predicts it won't help. But tune in tomorrow anyway for "the highest vote ever in a top 6 contest with 3 women and 3 men singing inspirational tunes..." and Sanjaya, on Leno, wearing Paula's outfit.

And now, for the contestants:

Diva 1 agreed with the judges that Chris R. started the night off with a killer vocal and performance, even if it took him about 20 seconds to really get started. However, he looked like he was headed to the local sadie hawkins dance with the cargos and the suit coat. Killer jacket? Only if we're talking about his fashion sense.

Diva 1 agrees with Swollen Diva -- Melinda is phoning it in, and her outfit was no exception to the conclusion that this was just another day at the office for her. Beware, however. Hayley wore those same shoes, and she's gone. This may mean Melinda finds herself in the bottom for the first time tomorrow.

Diva 1 agrees again with Swollen Diva, and the judges, that Blake was rather boring tonight. Surprisingly, it's Diva 1's favorite vocal of his in the last few weeks even if it wasn't very original or exciting. Apparently singing John Lennon requires an "homage" jacket. And while the Divas are sure that Paula gets all "sensitive and emotional" about Blake, let's keep the comments to the song please!

Lakisha, Lakisha, Lakisha. As Swollen Diva notes, Diva 1 rightly warned about the folly of picking an Idol song. Two Idol songs + two weeks = bottom two.

Phil. Another great song choice, and great performance (albeit slightly less great than last week). I just wish he would quit dressing like a poor man's Frank Sinatra. The hat worked for bald Daniel Powter, a 35-ish no man who bolted to the peak of fame last year with his "Bad Day" song, and it can work for you Phil! Besides, even if your wife needs to wear an H&M dress (and she was), you have an army of stylists at your disposal. Use them, Diva 1 would!

Diva 1 hopes, however, that Simon's prediction comes true and Phil is around for a little while longer...

Finally, Jordin. Diva 1 was waiting for Randy's signature pronouncement: "it was a little pitchy in the beginning, and the end, but the middle was hot!" Is Diva 1 the ONLY one who sees this? We want to love her as much as SD, but I feel like she's not giving me much to work with... other than that dress! Where can I get one?!

Until tomorrow, Diva 1 out!

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Ah, what a great night of Idol. Honestly, I would not have cared if they all sang Whitney covers tonight. At least Sanjaya was gone. I loved that no one mentioned him, but I felt sure that's at least part of what Simon was referring to when he said that the competition really started tonight.

Are we ready to make finalist predictions?? Once again, I think Jordin has a strong chance to win it all. Everyone loves to see a contestant grow, and while Melinda is awesome, she's been unchangingly awesome from the first week. Jordin, on the other hand, has made a couple of stumbles, but in the last two weeks has pulled off those "rising music" performances that win Idol competitions.

Don't get me wrong, I loved Melinda's performance. She's mind-boggingly good. She is truly in a class by herself. But, honestly, she's too good for Idol. And that's why I don't think she'll win.

For once, I see what Diva One means about Blake being boring. I think he gave a solid performance, and I love the tone of his voice, but he hasn't been pulling out the "wow" factor needed at this stage in the competition.

And LaKeisha. *sigh* She needs to go for her sheer stupidity in picking yet another song from a former Idol. Good Lord, do these people not read Diva One's Lessons??? Hell, even PAULA told her it was a bad choice. Well, told her as much as Paula can.

The rest...who were they?

Swollen Diva OUT


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Thursday, April 19, 2007

Sanity Returns to the Reality TV Universe!!

I will probably just echo the feelings of my fellow Divas, and probably all of the hearing world, but PRAISE JESUS, the reign of terror/joke that is Sanjaya is FINALLY OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And not only that, drug-addled Jael finally got the boot from American's Next Top Model.

For the first time in many Wednesdays, I slept soundly, knowing that a few things were right in the world.

Diva 1, right there with you on your assessment of Country Night, except of course for your Blake bash. It was even MORE exciting given how the voting shook out. What a bottom three that was!! Blake and LaKeisha! Wowza.

LaKeisha did deserve her spot in the bottom. She has done nothing in weeks and weeks but prove that, as DH said from the beginning, she is a one-trick-pony. Her voice certainly has power, but no real range or versatility. And that power was all yelling on Tuesday- yelling at poor Baby Jesus that HE HAD BETTER COME AND TAKE THIS DAMN WHEEL, DAMMIT!! As Diva 1 so rightly pointed out, she broke the rules picking a former Idol's song, and although she won with that choice once, she got stung this time. I think her time on Idol is drawing to a close, she is just no match for Jordin or Melinda.

As much as I love Blake, he did kinda suck this week. But Diva 1 still shouldn't bash him! :) Was it me or was he horribly pitchy?? I was waiting for the judges to go in for the kill, but then they praised him? Even this Blake fan thought that was bizarre.

I also didn't think Jordin's vocals were all that. And I found her song choice oddly impudent. But once again Simon and I were sharing a brain. As her voice soared and she closed the song, I thought to myself "she could actually win this."

And just a few words about Phil- I still can't stand him, but I gotta him credit. He was AMAZING. Where has this guy been all season?? My jaw was on the floor. I kept checking myself- what, wait, this is Phil? This is country? But this is actually good??

I feel as if Idol is finally back on track- Diva 4 was correct, justice was finally served to Sanjaya, and we actually saw some interesting performances and growth among the contestants! This is shaping up to be an interesting battle!

Swollen Diva Out!
22 days until Due Date!!!


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Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Justice is SERVED!! on American IDOL!!

FINALLY! Justice is served on a platter this week, with Sanjaya Malakar being eliminated from American Idol.

How La Lu YA Praise the Lord!!

Bye, Bye, Sanjaya, don't let the Idol door hit your boney ass on the way out!!

Nice try, Vote for the Worst and Howard Stern - hope you enjoyed yourselves.

I have nothing more to say.

D4 outie.

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Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Jesus Take the Microphone

Idol agreed was on the better side this week, but then this diva has a hankering for country. I LOVED jordin and Melinda... for me my top 2.

Sanjaya is getting more ridiculous every week and the bigger joke is that he seems so taken with himself. The only thing more tragic than Sanjaya tonite for me was Avril Lavigne's racoon eye make-up on Letterman. Someone please remove all makeup from her possession until the girl learns how to use it without offending defenseless wildlife.

Seacrest and Cowell got into some naughty bickering with Ryan practically coming to Sangina's defense. Is it me, or is this turning into a three-way?

and speaking of Letterman, for those who missed it, the 20-something geek who started the 'votefortheworst' website was a Tonight Show guest and is collecting his 15 minutes of fame. Apparently being the worst and voting for the worst clearly have their priveleges.

In other reality Tv news, Bachelor Officer Andy finally sent home Barbie Doll #2. Erin I think her name was. Her and her fast friend who went packing last week clearly took a wrong turn on their way to starring on "The Girls Next Door".

On Workout, Jackie is working out her lips juggling Rebecca and Tiffany.

And my favorite family, The Roloffs, celebrated Amy's Birthday and Molly's 13th birthday with some good old fashion cake.

D4 out.

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Smokin' Stacey Swings Away, and Sunoco Sanjaya Strikes Out ...

Who would have ever thought that Country Week -- traditionally the most dreaded of Idol genres -- would prove to be the LEAST boring show to date? Certainly not this diva, much to her surprise and grateful thanks.

Diva 1 hates to begin by saying "I told you so" but she did say -- just last week -- that there was a performer somewhere inside of Phil Stacey. Stacey earned his highest praise ever, and rightfully so. Great vocal, great performance. Ok, bad outfit.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Georgia, there is a Sunoco gas station attendant who wants his outfit back and Bonnie Raitt wants all references to her name and Sanjaya's song stricken from the record books.

The Idols are also clearly not paying attention to the capital R Rules, as two more cardinal rules were broken: (1) never sing one of the mentor's songs, Jordin, and (2) never sing the song of a former Idol winner, Lakisha. Heed these words people! Even so...

Melinda Doolittle was back in fine form, giving the second best performance of the night. The hair extensions took YEARS off her appearance, even if the outfit was poorly chosen. One note, if Martina McBride hasn't heard the song, you can't call it "new." Hence no credit given for MD's unsubstantiated claims that this song, in fact, was recorded recently.

Jordin gets props for the third best performance of the evening in this Diva's book, although I did think it was a big nasally and tremulous. But she was dressed more like a Woodstock refugee and less like a country girl. I'll give her points, the outfit did look like it had wings (and a bit of the lame jacket she wore last week worked into the trim).

Lakisa gets props for the golden cowboy boots, the great makeup and the flattering dress. Nothing else.

Chris needs to give up his members only jackets, his nasal affection, and his cheesy camera side glare. I was reminded at points what a strong voice he has, but odds are he's in the bottom two given Hayley's absence, and the blinders the public seems to wear with respect to Sanjaya.

Last but not least, Blake. Again, I just don't get it -- he put the DULL in DULLSVILLE and the entire tv viewing population was staring up his nostrils again. We got red shoes last week for Latin week and he couldn't even muster a big belt buckle for country week? Even rascal flatts, the do gooders of country music wouldn't have worn that sweater (in fact the most conservative one just wed a playboy playmate). I expect a little less Hamptons and a little more bad boy if he's going to graduate from Boring Blake to Best.

Seriously, if things don't improve, Diva 1 could be out permanently!

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Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Latin Lessons...

Diva 1 is back in full stride following last week's hiatus (due to internet problems and Easter weekend) with this week's Idol Lessons. What DID we learn?

(1) If it wasn't written or sun by Gloria Estefan or Santana, its not Latin music. Seriously folks, five of tonight's eight songs were written and/or made famous by these two performers. Has no one heard of Celia Cruz (who got an honorable shout out from the Dawg), Julio Iglesias or Perry Como? Even Jon Secada (a former back up singer for the previously-referenced Estefan) recorded into the 90s and Julio's son sang in this decade. I'm even pretty sure that Charo had some music that might have been better choices than tonight's selection. And bonus points to anyone who knows who made Besame Mucho a "hit" song...

(2) Latin music requires a major in the color red, and a minor in animal prints. Seriously, count it up. Three contestants wore red tonight: Lakisha, Chris (who seriously looked like he stepped out of the Thriller video), and Blake (even the shoes). Three contestants wore seriously red lipstick: Melinda, Hayley, and Jordin. Multiple people wore some kind of printed clothing: Lakisha, Hayley, Chris and Sanjaya.

(3) Latin music is boring. At least when sung by American Idols. To wit:

Melinda looked like an old woman, fresh from the funeral home, and sung Sway as if it was a dirge. Michael Buble, who was just on last week, released this last year and it was totally fresh. The Pussycat Dolls sing it, and actually sound (a) like they're singing and (b) sweetly sexy. Take notes MD.

Our wedding singer was back, and proved that even satin camel toe cannot distract the judges from her lack of talent.

Jordin once again looked like she through a lame stage coat over her waitress' uniform to make it to the stage on time. Didn't get the judges' ravings, and I didn't think it sounded at all like Michael Jackson -- proving that JLo is not the end all be all of musical advice.

Blake started off intriguing, but ended up blank. Chris, in my opinion, is kicking his beat-boxing butt and had the hottest performance of the night.

As for Sanjaya, I now know what a woman with a mustache looks like. Thank you Mr. Malakar. Is it really a compliment when all the judges can say is, "well, it didn't totally s*ck?"

Finally, Diva 1 thinks Phil Stacey is not getting his due -- great vocal tonight, and great song choice. Better movement on stage. There IS a performer in there somewhere.

Until tomorrow,
Diva 1 out

ps -- Watch Dancing with the Stars. Joey FatOne rules!

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Gina's Graceful Farewell on Idol

well, another elimination nite on idol and another talented idol contestant gets robbed by Sanjaya. Not even in the bottom 3, Sanjaya should feel like a schmuck for being in this competition while actual talent leaves us each week and he stays to annoy us some more with his ridiculous hair, oversized clothing and cocky attitude that makes Simon seem nice. He should take his skinny ass and vote himself off and run far far away. Sanjaya has made this season of American Idol an absolute Farce!

Gina and Haley were voted in the bottom 2 tonite. Haley clearly thought it was her swan song but her "great leg" campaign seems to be working for her. She's working her gams for everything they've got and as Simon admitted, she's got some great legs. She's appeared in nothing but short shorts and short dresses up to her cooter since the competition began. When she inevitably IS voted off Idol, this diva's fairly sure she can book a Nair commercial.

Gina was graceful and fought thru her tears to sing her final song on idol tonite, ironically titled "smile though your heart is aching". Sorry, Gina. Check your bank account tomorrow - Sangina strikes again!

I can just imagine the contempt the other Idol contestants must have towards Sangina on these elimination nites.

But, Idol world, fear not. Idol fame is what you make of it whether you're # 5 or #1. Anyone heard a peep from Taylor Hicks since last season? uh no. But Kelli Pickler and Chris Daughtry are everywhere... you almost forget who actually won the competition.

D4 annoyed and out.

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Officer and a Gentlemen New Bachelor Begins

The new bachelor premiered this week featuring 30 year old Lt. Andy Baldwin, triathelete, doctor and officer. As far as bachelors go Andy might be the most decent gent they've featured yet. And for being such a good guy, I was surprised at the bad lot of women he was given. I was largely unimpressed by most of them, but one of those 25 women will be proposed to by the end of the bachelor season. as they say, it only takes one.

ABC is having a field day with the "officer and a gentlemen" tagline and all the bravado that comes with it. Not sure if it was Andy's car or not, but Lt. Andy Baldwin arrives at the bachelor castle in a Lambergini like batman in the gotham city! The first episode, as per the course, consisted of 50 hugs (25 women x hello hug + goodbye hug), 25 cheek kisses, 25 whats your name exchanges, 1 really bad joke about a muffin, 1 corny fortune cookie recited, 3 blunt approaches to the rose on the tray and countless pleasantries about nothing.

This season has some of the same bachelor ingredients we've come to know and love: the dejected and bitter first nite send-homer, the foretelling of a woman obsessed - (ie. ambulance shot), cat fights, drunken stoopers, fake tits and tacky dresses. it also added some new ingredients to the mix: singing contestants better than american idol's Sanjaya (not a stretch), gymnastics, baking with alcohol, and patriotism.

I'll give Andy this, by the time the first rose ceremony took place he did a fairly good job of weeding out the riff-raff. I'm grateful for the fact that i do not have to see the woman OCD body builder with the enormously large eyes and mouth on camera again....she got more of her share of camera time as they cut to her after every single rose was handed out. i swore i wouldnt get sucked into another bachelor but here i go again!

d4

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